Out of the Darkness
  • Home
  • About the Author
    • Meghan's Hope
    • Press Kit: Invite Kimberly to present at your event
    • Upcoming Events
  • Buy the Book!
  • Resources
    • Resources for Parents, Grandparents, Siblings, and Family/Friends
    • Memorial Gift ideas
    • Recommended Reading
    • For Professionals and Paraprofessionals
  • Grief Support Blog
  • Reviews
  • Contact

The Nationwide Make Safe Happen SuperBowl Ad – A Trigger for Bereaved Parents?

2/2/2015

6 Comments

 


Did you see the Nationwide Make Safe Happen Superbowl Ad?  If you have not, please beware it may be a powerful trigger for you.  How did it make you feel?  There is also a longer Ad that explains the Make Safe Happen program in more depth and is a little less emotionally jarring here. 

No matter how new or “old” your grief, anything that reminds you of your child, their death, or the way they died could certainly be a trigger.  That commercial no doubt blindsided everyone, but it may have been especially difficult for bereaved parents, especially those who lost young children, and especially if their child died from a preventable accident.

While it’s understandable that bereaved parents might be angered or upset by the commercial, it is my hope that they will be able to understand two things through their grief.

First, triggers are a normal and unavoidable part of grieving and you should absolutely talk about your feelings.   Get support if you need it.  It’s okay to feel that pain.  It’s okay to cry, to be angry, and to suddenly be brought back to the day and way your child died.  It’s difficult and it’s upsetting but it’s also a normal part of grieving.  No one wants to be blindsided by a trigger.  Triggers hurt, no matter what causes them.  Allow yourself time to process, to understand where those feelings you are having are coming from and why.  Remember, they are born of love.  The love you have for your child.

Nationwide did not make the commercial with any disrespect for bereaved parents.  Quite the contrary, they are sympathetic to your pain and want to spare others the same pain.  They did so with a boldly emotional ad that was designed to get people’s attention and make them aware of what they can do to protect their children, so no other parent need ever know our pain.

The ad brought up all the things we, as bereaved parents, struggle with every single day.  The fact that our child died.  The fact they will never get cooties, learn to fly, ride their bike, or get married.  We’ll never see them grow up or grow older.  Our children are like the boy in the ad.  They died and were denied their future… we were denied our future the way we imagined it would be.  It reminds us that our dreams were snatched from us.  This ad blatantly and unexpectedly reminded us of that.   That was not Nationwide’s intent, but it is an unavoidable side effect of their very emotional ad.

For some parents, you may have been reminded of how your child died.  Perhaps your child died of drowning, of a tip-over, from a car accident, or from poisoning or choking.  Perhaps the children pictured in the ad were similar in age or appearance to your child.  Perhaps the other images were relatable for you and it was disturbing.  Perhaps you still harbor guilt because you were not able to prevent the cause of your child’s death and this commercial stirred that up.  At a time when you were having an otherwise enjoyable time, perhaps with your grief on the back burner, only to have it brought to the surface and “ruin” your day.  Believe me, I get that.  I still carry guilt with me and I always will. 

Please remember, Nationwide meant no disrespect to bereaved parents.   It would not hurt so much if it were not for the fact we love them so much.  We miss them so much.  We’d give anything to have them back.  They get that.


Which brings me to the second point; I desperately hope that despite the pain and feelings that might have surfaced as you watched that commercial, that you don’t lose sight of the very important message the ad was trying to convey.  Nationwide wants to prevent kids from dying.  They want to tackle the fact that preventable accidents are the #1 cause of death to children.  They don’t want any other parent to ever know our pain.  They want to save the lives of children.

Yes, I’ve lost a child to a preventable accident.  Yes, the Nationwide ad made me cry.  Yes, it was a “buzzkill.”  It blindsided people, on purpose.  That’s exactly what happens when a child dies from a preventable accident, too.  As bereaved parents know all too well, one minute your child is fine and then, without warning, they are dead.  It happened to at least one parent while they were watching the SuperBowl yesterday. 

The Nationwide SuperBowl ad was also brilliant.  Why? It was raw, real, honest, and absolute truth.  It was creative and emotional. It started a conversation.  One no one wants to have.  Yet it’s one everyone should have.  One everyone needs to have. It hit at the fear of every parent; that their child could die.  Something we know all too well.

It made millions of people aware not only that preventable accidents are the #1 cause of death to children, but gave them a place to find information so they can prevent those accidents and protect their children.  They have a free website www.makesafehappen.com and a free IOS and Android app that allows parents to go room by room, by age, or by safety category to find out what dangers may lurk and how to prevent them from injuring or killing their child.  They give strategies and resources for prevention.  

That information may not apply to you, but there are millions of parents who need that information.  There are millions of children whose lives could be potentially saved with this information.  The SuperBowl was the best way to reach the most parents at once.   Nationwide was not the only company raising a social issue during the SuperBowl.  They were not the only one pulling at heart strings.  They just happened to be one of the ads that unintentionally hit bereaved parents the hardest. 

As many of you may know, I am a vocal child safety advocate.  I lost my Meggie when she was 3 to a furniture tip-over.  I started Meghan’s Hope to educate other parents about the danger of tip-over and prevention so no other child would die the way Meggie did.  Yet they still are, and in greater numbers than before!  I have partnered with Nationwide on their Make Safe Happen campaign because I can’t do it alone.  Because I believe we need to raise awareness and I know for a fact raw emotion can compel at least some people to action.  Because I believe with education and resources and a wakeup call, we can save lives.   

I’m sure if any of us had the knowledge and the resources to prevent our child’s death, we would have.  No matter what the cause of their death was.  Yes, we are still hurting, and in many ways, always will be. We can’t let our own pain cloud the fact other parents can be spared our pain. 

May you find comfort and peace in your grief and find a place in your heart to understand Nationwide meant no disrespect, no ill intent to parents who have lost their child.  They want to protect children.  They want to save lives.   They want to spare parents our pain. 

All opinions expressed are entirely my own, however Kimberly and Meghan’s Hope are partners with Nationwide’s Make Safe Happen Campaign and has received compensation materially or financially for the promotion of the Make Safe Happen Campaign.

6 Comments
laurie broadus link
2/2/2015 10:40:42 am

I lost my son to a spontaneous street race April 11 2006..LIFE CAN CHANGE WITH THE BLINK OF AN EYE.... IT HURTS TO SAY THAT FINIAL GOOD BYE. MARS CFL INC...MOTHERS BRINGING..AWEARNESS..& REAL SUPPORT... WE WANTO HELP OTHERS IN OUR SHOES... WE ARE A 501 C 3. I have been working on my own BUT I WANTVTO BAN WITH OTHER PARENTS IN MY SHOES.. TOGETHER WE CAN FIGHT THE BLUES




Reply
Jeff
2/2/2015 02:30:52 pm

I too am a bereaved parent. I was shocked and saddened by the commercial. I find it offensive.

While I accept your explanations and can even understand some of your reasoning I also see many flaws.

You say that the point of the ad was to shock the viewer. That it may be a trigger for a bereaved parent. But you say that we should accept that shock because there are other triggers. That is no different than someone telling us it is time to move past our child's death because everyone dies.

You say that we should accept the shock and the trigger because it is a valuable point to be made. So as long as I am making a good point it is okay for me to be misogynistic or racist? "The ends justify the means" is a difficult thing to just accept and not a valid explanation for doing most things. I contend that because of the level of shock at the big realization that many, if not most watchers, lost interest so the point was lost. I know that I didn't even realize there was a website until I read your post here.

From my point of view as someone who worked in the marketing end of a print publications I can tell you that the negative press outweighs the perceived value you mention. The average American was expecting a cute, fun, or amusing commercial. When they were shocked by the death of a child they stopped paying attention. So many were turned off in such a way that they missed the point. I would be curious to see statistics on how many people actually got the message. From my view on Social Media I can tell you the numbers were low. Nationwide as a company took a hit because they came across a "Scare Tactic" insurance sales company.

While I think there is value to this kind of message in the right forum. I do not think it was during a family friendly sporting event noted for having comical, fun, and entertaining commercials. What about a child like my 11 son who lost his sister. What about when that child was watching a cute boy and the silly cooties and then was shocked and overwhelmed. Perhaps that trigger ruined a positive family moment or brought up memories that child and parent were not ready to confront at that point. Had you considered the negative effect of the targeted shock ad. In your reply you mention that if it bothers people so much we should seek help. So the children that were hurt by your commercial should seek help? Your message is okay to hurt them because it might help others? Are the children you are trying to save more important than one who has lost his sister? Why is it okay for you to attack that child (You said that you expected the ad to trigger feelings, so in my opinion that makes it a wilful attack.) Your ad can create hurt, and depression. These have very real consequences too.

There is a time and a place for such messages. I contend that time and place is not during prime time family friendly programming where the expectation if entertainment. It is during adult programming. It is during the news or a prime time news or events show. Not during a sporting event.

Having lost my Daughter, I understand your pain. I understand the need to "fix it", or to prevent other children from a preventable death. I understand and feel that loss every day and there are triggers from music, to a video, to a color, or the shape of a cloud. I can deal with my triggers, expected and unexpected. But I also have the right to stand up against those triggers intentionally thrust upon me by someone with consideration to my or my families well being. I respectfully disagree with your decision to run this ad during the Super Bowl. I respectfully submit that your well thought out ideals did not consider the impact to many bereaved parents or siblings. Nor did it consider how the message would be lost to so many who where too surprised to listen to the rest of the ad. Lastly, I respectfully inform you that I will exercise my right and I will not be doing business with Nationwide.

I know your heart is in the right place. Sadly, I think your vision is a little myopic. Wishing you peace and healing along your journey. I wish you success in your mission to help save children.

- Jeff

Reply
Cheryl
2/2/2015 05:44:02 pm

Very well said my feelings exactly.

Reply
Tammy
2/2/2015 02:34:13 pm

anybody that has lost a child any TV show any story pictures I could go on are going to be triggers this was no different and you just accept it and deal with it

Reply
Tracey
2/3/2015 12:00:51 am

The Super Bowl is a televised event watched by children, too. My living children had their own upsetting reaction in addition to watching the adults they love react to this ad.

Reply
Karen
2/3/2015 04:07:03 am

I'm sorry for the loss of your precious daughter and I applaud your campaign to bring awareness to preventable deaths and injuries. However, there is one major flaw in your rationale about the "shock" factor of the commercial -- YOU KNEW WHAT WAS COMING. There is no way you can relate to the trigger effect it had on parents who were blindsided. You have an important message, but this commercial caused immeasurable pain. You keep defending this ad in the name of saving at least one child, but you owe thousands of parents -- along with children who have lost siblings and friends -- a huge apology. Did the ad finish by pointing viewers to a website for more information? Because if it did, I didn't see it. Good message, horrible marketing of it. Triggers happen, but, I'm going to name it -- this was just mean.

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    Picture

    Archives

    October 2015
    September 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed

Proudly powered by Weebly